SORRY TO ALL

hi everyone
a big sorry to everyone for following reasons.
1. i have pathetic writing skills so a lot of people feel bad with my grammar. as suggested my someone i should take up a short course on english writing. i am considering that and soon i will correct myself. thought the purspose of the blog is to ventilate my thoughts i has no intention to pass judgements or criticise anyone.
2. some content on the page was also taken from some webpages for the purspose of knowledge sharing. those pages have been deleted so now the content is all genuine.(yes with poor grammar)
3.i have not been able to upload anything for quite a long as i was busy with some assignments. i insist people to share their thoughts on the blog so that other can also enjoy that.
4.the blog is just to be in touch with my knowns and loved ones and has no other purpose to dominate or rule over someones thoughts or feelings.

regards
:-)

for vijay

this one is for you vijay.
i had not been uploading anything for a long.
manoj spoke about you so thought of writing this congratulation note for you.
a ton of wishes for you and have a wonderful life ahead dear.
and yes congratulations for your new car.i am sure i will get a ride very soon.
i should be writing something very soon.
glad you people read the blog i thought i have become a thing of past.
lots of love
regards
prince gera

unforgettables

it was 7 in the morning when my phone buzzed. it doesnt really buzzes but i thought may be its somebody from the batch and must have called to confirm my arrival.
renu..it was...i thought for a few seconds what could it be?
a chill ran down my spine the moment i heard the line "sir, neeraj from morning batch has passed away"
what life is?
the young,chirping and one of the most keen learner from the batch who just started his life left everyone in between.
it was one of the most painful funerals i had ever attended.
how could this happen. what destiny wants?
i still remember, its merely a month before i had moved out to market for somework.
a young cute neeraj approached me with a smile and requested me to have a glass of juice that he had ordered for me. he ordered a glass of juice the moment he saw me.
i wonder how did he develop such courtesy.

how can we afford to fight with each other. when life has such an abrupt ending.
why cant we just remain together and happy.

regards
prince gera

a small trick

everytime you feel low. angry, frustated or even annoyed at something.
just try this line..
hear what comes from you. it could be something like..what a shit..
or kya traffic jam again...or whatever

just repeat the same line in a qawalli format(sing this line in your mind as if you are singing a qawalli) and add WAH WAH at the end.
then see the difference.

regards
prince gera

a very simple tip

लोगों को काबू करने का मंत्र

जिद्दी इंसान को हाथ जोड़ कर
घमंडी के आगे सर झुका के
लालची को धन के लोभ से
बुद्धिमान से समझ की बात करके
मुर्ख से हाँ में हाँ मिला कर

businessman ki liye..

आपका बिज़नस कल से एक नयी उम्मीद देखेगा.
सिर्फ यह कुछ बातें अपनाने से अगर आपकी ज़िन्दगी बदल जाये तो इन्हें अपनाने में आप पीछे नहीं हटेंगे मुझे पूरा यकीन है. मेरे इतने साल मैनेजमेंट शिक्षा में बिताने की बाद मैं कह सकता हूँ की यकीनन आपको एक नयी दिशा देगा.

१. अपने काम को एक सेवा की तरह देखिये और सोचिये आप किस तरह से किसी के काम आ सकते है. यह आपको उत्साहित कर देगा. अगर आप अपने प्रोडक्ट या सेवा को लेकर उत्साहित नहीं है. तो क्या आपको लगता है की आप किसी और को उस सेवा या प्रोडक्ट के लिए उत्साहित कर सकते है.
सबसे बहतरीन सलेस्मन सिर्फ सामान ही नहीं बल्कि उसके साथ उत्साह भी बेचता है. याद करिए जब आप कुछ खरीद के लाये थे, जिसे खरीद के आप बहुत उत्साहित थे, कितने उत्साह से आपने उस सामान को अपने दोस्तों और परिवारजनों को दिखाया था. याद है. मुझे पूरा यकीन है की आप उस दुकानदार से भी बेहतर समझा रहे थे उस सामान के बारे में.
यह उत्साह आपको ख़ुशी देगा अपने प्रोडक्ट या सेवा के प्रति. और यह ख़ुशी अपने मन में रखिये क्यूंकि अगर आज आपके मन में ख़ुशी है तो कल आपको ख़ुशी ही मिलेगी और आपके मन में उदासी है तो हर और उदासी देखेगी.
२. आज से निंदा त्याग दें. यह सिर्फ रिश्ते तोड़ता है. घर या बहार, अपने या पराये सबकी निंदा से हासिल कुछ नहीं होगा. हम में से कोई पूरा नहीं इसीलिए हम इस पर काबू पाने की कोशिश तो कर ही सकते है.
कुछ ख़राब लगने पर शिकायत की जगह अगर हम उसकी वजह जाने तो आसान हो जायेगा अपनी बात कह पाना.
अपने आप से पूछिए कैसा लगता है जब कोई आपसे आपकी या आपकी सेवा की शिकायत करता है. कैसा लगता है जब आपके परिवार के लोग आपकी किसी
बात को नापसंद करें.
प्रशंसा करें. एक काम के लिए की गयी प्रशंसा बाकी ९९ कामों के लिए उत्साहित करेगी.
अपने आप से पूछें अगर कोई आपके किये गए एक काम के लिए आपकी प्रशंसा करे तो आप खुद ही और कामों को मन लगा कर करना चाहेंगे.
सिर्फ एक बार अपने आस पास नज़रें घुमाएं और देखें अपने आस पास के माहौल और लोगों को. उनमे ज़रूर कमियाँ है. मगर मैं दावे से कह सकता हूँ की उनमें कम से कम एक
बात प्रशंसा के लायक होगी. बस उसे ढूंढ निकालिए. देखिये हो सकता है आप उसे कह ना सके. तो अपने मन में ही कहे यह सब. वर्ना हिम्मत करें और कह दे. प्रशंसा सच्ची करें. सब बदलने लग जायेगा. सिर्फ एक बार करके तो देखें. हो सकता है आप कहें यह तो आज होगा कल फिर क्या. आप समझदार है और जानते हैं की कल सुबह आप फिर खाना खायेंगे, फिर से नहायेंगे तो क्यों ना मन को भी उसके हिस्से का खाना दे. मन का भोजन है बेहतरीन विचार. उसे उसके हिस्से का भोजन दे. नज़र फेरे चारो तरफ और दिल खोल के प्रशंसा करें. देखे
कितने बेहतरीन लोगो और सुखों का साथ मिला है आपको.. ...यह नए दिन की शुरुआत है...
३. लोगों में सच्ची दिलचस्पी लें. उनके पास बहुत कुछ है कहने के लिए. बताने के लिए. . उनके तजुर्बे, उनके सुख , दुःख, शौंक और भी बहुत कुछ. आप १५ दिनों में नए दोस्त बना लेंगे. सिर्फ लोगों में दिलचस्पी लेके. शायद इतने दोस्त आप एक साल में ना बना सके अगर आप उनसे उम्मीद रखें की वो आपमें दिलचस्पी दिखाएं. कृष्ण बन कर एक सुदामा मिलेंगे और सुदामा बन कर रहने पर कई कृष्ण.
४. मुस्कुराइए ...यह सबसे छोटा रास्ता है किसी के भी दिल में उतरने का. मुस्कुरा के मिलिए देखिये बदल जायेगा बहुत कुछ.
५. नाम ..सबसे प्यारा शब्द. .याद रखिये इसे. इसके लिए बहुत कुछ करते हैं लोग. उनका नाम याद रखिये और दोहराइए बातचीत के दौरान और देखियें कैसे बदलता है सब कुछ.
६. लोग को सुनिए..बोलना आज से उनका काम. आप सिर्फ सुनिए...सब अच्छा बोलने वाला वही है जो सब बेहतर सुने..
७. बहस या इंसान चुन लीजिये आपने क्या जीतना है..बहस या इंसान. अगर इंसान जीतना है तो बहस हारना शुरू कर दीजिये. और जीतने दीजिये सामने वाले को. बहस करना ऐसा है जैसे दुश्मन बनाने का बेहतरीन तरीका. बिज़नस में होने वाला मोल भाव बहस नहीं. वो एक प्रक्रिया है सही निष्कर्ष पर पहुचने की. जहाँ दोनों का मान रहता है और दोनों रिश्ता बनाये रखने के लिए एक दुसरे को परस्पर जगह देते है...
८. लोगों से ना कहें की वोह गलत है..चाहे आप उनकी बात से सहमत नहीं. यह उनके आत्मस्वाभिमान को ठेस पहुचाता है.
अगर वोह कहें की आज गर्मी है तो कहें आज गर्मी है .
अगर आपको लगता है की आज गर्मी नहीं तो कहें ...आज गर्मी है और पता नहीं क्यों मैं ठीक महसूस कर रहा हूँ.
देखिये आपने उन्हें गलत नहीं कहा और आपकी बात भी राखी गयी.
उदारहण के लिए. वोह कहता है की आपकी कंपनी महंगी है...
तो उपयुक्त क्या है..
नहीं...आप गलत है या
हाँ आप ठीक कह रहे हैं मगर.....देखिये मगर कहते ही आपने उसे गलत साबित कर दिया है..
अपनी बात रखने का सबसे बेहतरीन उपाय है...
आप ठीक कह रहे हैं हमारा प्रोडक्ट महंगा है...और.(और शब्द जोड़ता है ) इसलिए हमने इसे और भी बेहतर बनाया है. और उसके लिए इसे सबसे बेहतरीन गुणों से भरा है.
आपकी बात भी रह जाये और सामने वाली की बात भी..
यह मत देखिये की आप क्या बेच रहे है यह देखिये की सामने वाला क्या खरीदना चाहता है. अपने बारें में वही बतायिएँ जो वो सुनना चाहे.
इसके लिए एक बेहतर श्रोता बनिए और जानिए की सामने वाला क्या चाहता है.
उदाहरण के लिए
अगर आप गाडी बेच रही है तो अपनी गाडी के बारें में नहीं..उनकी पसंद की गाडी के बारें में पूछिए.
और देखिये उन्हें अपनी पसंद की गाडी में क्या पसंद है. उनकी पसंद की अनुभूति उन्हें अपनी गाडी में भी करायिएँ.
इसके लिए आपको सुनना पड़ेगा. एक बेहतर श्रोता की तरह. उनकी बात रखिये और उसमें अपनी बात जोड़ दीजिये.

impress people

be a mirror with people. they like being with themselves.
just be with them and let them feel they are seeing there own image.
avoid advise and passing judgments.
regards
prince gera

win hearts!!!

1. “If You Want to Gather Honey, Don’t Kick Over the Beehive”

Here is an important principle in relationships: don’t criticize, condemn or complain. People rarely blame themselves for anything, so if you criticize them not only are they unlikely to change, but also they may resent toward you.

2. The Big Secret of Dealing with People

People will go long way – sometimes even become insane – just to get the appreciation they need. So be a person who give honest and sincere appreciation to others. That’s the big secret of dealing with people. If you do that, you can’t keep people from liking you.

Part Two. Six Ways to Make People Like You

1. Do This And You’ll be Welcome Anywhere

This chapter contains a famous quote by Dale Carnegie:

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

Are you interested in others? Do you want to know about them, admire their work, and eager to help them? If you do, they will also be interested in you.

2. A Simple Way to Make a Good First Impression

The way to make a good first impression is so simple that we sometimes forget it: smile. When you smile, people will feel that you are glad to meet them. They will feel accepted and get a good first impression about you.

3. If You Don’t Do This, You Are Headed for Trouble

People put tremendous importance on their names. Therefore it will be much easier for you to win their hearts if you approach them by using their names. Unfortunately, we often forget names.

I’m as guilty as anybody else here. Sometimes I’m introduced to someone only to forget his or her name right after the conversation. Another embarrassing situation is when I meet someone who call me by name but whose name I forget.

4. An Easy Way to Become a Good Conversationalist

It may seem counterintuitive, but being a good conversationalist is about by how good you talk. It’s about how good you listen. Encourage others to talk about themselves and be a good listener. People will feel appreciated and they will regard you as a nice people to talk with.

6. How to Make People Like You Instantly

To make people like you, make them feel important and do it sincerely. The desire to feel important is perhaps the deepest need someone has, so if you give it you will win their heart.

I wrote some practical tips on it in 33 Tips to Become a Well Liked Person.

Part Three. How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

1. You Can’t Win an Argument

You can only lose if you argue because – no matter what the outcome of the argumentation is – you won’t win their heart. So the way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.

This is something that is rather difficult for me. If I have an idea I’m confident about, I’m usually willing to argue to prove my point. This chapter shows me how wrong it is.

2. A Sure Way of Making Enemies – And How to Avoid It

A sure way of making enemies is by saying that they are wrong. People don’t like that, regardless of whether they are actually wrong or not. Such statements hurt their self-esteem. So learn to respect other people’s opinion, even when you disagree.

5. The Secret of Socrates

If you want to win other people to your way of thinking, it’s important to make them agree with you from the beginning. The way to do that is by asking questions that they will inevitably answer with “yes”. Every time they say “yes” they will become more receptive toward you. At the end, there is a good chance that they will accept the idea they previously rejected. This is a technique used by Socrates to convince his opponents.

8. A Formula that Will Work Wonders for You

There must be a reason why people say or act the way they do. Find that reason and talk from their point of view. If you understand them, they will in turn understand you.

Part Four. Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

1. If You Must Find Fault, This is the Way to Begin

As a leader, we sometimes need to correct the people we lead. But how can we do that without offending them? The answer is by praising and giving honest appreciation first. When we do that, they will become much more receptive to the correction we give.

6. How to Spur People On to Success

The best way to develop good traits in others is not by punishing them for incorrect actions but by rewarding them for correct actions. Praise every improvement they make, even the slightest one, and they will go to the right direction.

7. Give a Dog a Good Name

A good way to get others do things the way you want it is by giving them a fine reputation to live up to. For instance, if you want someone to be diligent then treat her as a diligent person and say so to her. Most likely she won’t disappoint you.from the book
how to influence people and make friends by dale careneige

who needs NLP

it can produce wonderful results If you experience these symptoms:

* depression
* loss of self-identity
* general dissatisfaction
* emotional detachment
* fears, anxieties and phobias
* loss of confidence and self-esteem
* lacking personal awareness of self
* change in behavioral patterns
* mid-life crisis
* unmanageable stress due to life changes
* jealousy

prince gera

NLP:neuro linguistic programming

What is Neuro Linguistic Programming(NLP)

Neuro Linguistic Programming, as the name suggests –‘neuro’ refers to brain, ‘linguistic’ refers to language and ‘programming’ is the installation of a strategy, procedure or plan. NLP is the study of what works in thinking, language, and behavior. It provides a systematic framework for directing our brain and body. It defines the way how we code and produce excellence which enables us to achieve the results that we want in each area of life. With NLP, you can create a set of strategies that can work for you as to how you will make decisions, build lasting relationships, create excellence in your personal and professional life, communicate to motivate your fellow men, and create balance in your life.

NLP is software manual for the bio-computer situated between your two ears. NLP is an effective tool with which you can produce desired results and enjoy peak in your work. It works as a peak performance technique for you.

Today, around the world, NLP is being practiced by Therapists, Counselors, Students, Stage Performers, Sportspersons, CEO’s, Managers, Corporate Executives, Self-Employed People, Businesspersons, Sales and Multi Level Marketing (MLM) leaders, and Politicians.

NLP helps you to learn how to do the following and excel in your life:

* NLP helps you to develop your ability to tap into your unconscious mind and draw on its awesome potential.
* NLP helps you to develop your ability to generate cooperation and trust in people around you.
* NLP helps you to develop your ability to manage your thoughts and feelings so that you are in control of your emotions.
* NLP helps you be more flexible so that you have a number of choices over the challenges and situations in your personal and professional life.
* NLP helps you develop new ways of behavioral choices that support you whatever the changes in the external world.
* NLP helps you to determine your and others value hierarchy and resolve any conflict.
* NLP helps you to have the ability to positively reframe any situation, challenge or behavior to produce more choices.
* NLP helps you to give permanence to any experience.

The Presuppositions of NLP

The thirteen presuppositions are the central principles central of NLP; they are its guiding philosophy, its ‘beliefs’. These principles are not claimed to be true or universal. You do not have to believe they are true. They are called presuppositions because you pre-suppose them to be true and then act as if they were. You then discover what happens. If you like the results then continue to act as if they are true. They form a set of ethical principles for life.

1. People respond to their experience, not to reality itself.
We do not know what reality is. Our senses, beliefs, and past experience give us a map of the world from which to operate. A map can never be exactly accurate; otherwise it would be the same as the ground it covers. We do not know the territory, so for us, the map is the territory. Some maps are better than others for finding your way around. We navigate life like a ship through a dangerous area of sea; as long as the map shows the main hazards, we will be fine. When maps are faulty and do not show the dangers, then we are in danger of running aground. NLP is the art of changing these maps, so we have greater freedom of action.

2. Having a choice is better than not having a choice.
Always try to have a map for yourself that gives you the widest and richest number of choices. Act always to increase choice. The more choices you have, the freer you are and the more influence you have.

3. People make the best choice they can at the time.
A person always makes the best choice they can, given their map of the world. The choice may be self-defeating, bizarre or evil, but for them, it seems the best way forward. Give them a better choice in their map of the world and they will take it. Even better give them a superior map with more choices in it.

4. People work perfectly.
No one is wrong or broken. They are carrying out their strategies perfectly, but the strategies may be poorly designed and ineffective. Find out how you and others do what they do so their strategy can be changed to something more useful and desirable.

5. All actions have a purpose.
Our actions are not random; we are always trying to achieve something, although we may not be aware of what that is.

6. Every behaviour has a positive intention.
All our actions have at least one purpose - to achieve something that we value and benefits us. NLP separates the intention or purpose behind an action from the action itself. A person is not their behaviour. When a person has a better choice of behaviour that also achieves their positive intention, they will take it.

7. The unconscious mind balances the conscious; it is not malicious.
The unconscious is everything that is not in consciousness at the present moment. It contains all the resources we need to live in balance.

8. The meaning of the communication is not simply what you intend, but also the response you get.
This response may be different to the one you wanted. There are no failures in communication, only responses and feedback. If you are not getting the result you want, change what you are doing. Take responsibility for the communication.

9. We already have all the resources we need, or we can create them.
There are no unresourceful people, only unresourceful states of mind.

10. Mind and body form a system. They are different expressions of the one person.
Mind and body interact and mutually influence each other. It is not possible to make a change in one without the other being affected. When we think differently, our bodies change. When we act differently we change our thoughts and feelings.

11. We process all information through our senses.
Developing your sense so they become more acute gives you better information and helps you think more clearly.

12. Modeling successful performance leads to excellence.
If one person can do something it is possible to model it and teach it to others. In this way everyone can learn to get better results in their own way, you do not become a clone of the model – you learn from them.

13. If you want to understand - Act
The learning is in the doing.
prince gera
NLP practitioner

improve english

grammar tips
गा गे गी will
रहा ing
कर रहा है he is doing
कर रहा था he was doing
कर रहा होगा he will be doing
कर चूका है ,कर लिया है he has done/ i have done
कर चुका था i had done/ he had done
कर लिया होगा i will have done
चाहिए था should have + IIIrd form
कर दिया होता would have + 3rd form
चाहिए should
सकता है can
करना है have to
करना पड़ेगा will have to
चाहूँगा would like to
किया करता था i did (IInd form)
हुआ करता था used to
ता, ते, ती first form he eats / i eat
मैं हूँ i am
मैं था i was
मैं होऊंगा i will be
करो do it
करवाओ get it done


examples
now try to make sentences ending with these tips. it will make it easier for you to write diary entry.this will help you to write easily. the more you write easier it become for you to speak it.

prince gera

Confused after MBA?

it is a very common question i get from students. i am very confused after my MBA.
what should i do?

my reply is what did you think before joining an MBA.
he says nothing "just that i will have a wonderful job in a good company"

what kind of company? i asked
any company means a good MNC? he said

good company means what? what product? what services what job profile would you enjoy?
he said i didnt think that much.

so you made a castle without a map. you drove your car on road without a destination in your mind. its just like leaving your house to move to undecided location." i said

but my college staff promised me heaven and they showed me dreams.today i find myself nowhere" he said
"what did they promise" i asked

"they said you will get a high paying job with lots of perks" he said

now what is the problem" i asked
i am getting a job with very less salary or even no salary. he said
but why i asked

"because i dont posses the right skills for that job. and they want me to learn it in their industry so thats why they cant pay me good or even some cant even pay anything because i will learn on their expenses" he said

then you should gain skills in the industry and work even at a less salary. i said

no, i paid 5 lacs for my MBA and i am an MBA. according to my college and my teachers i am a topper." he said

but you still dont possess the right skill" i said

but i paid 5 lacs" he said

is industry responsible for it" i asked

no" he said

what is the best option you have"i asked
i will shout in my college and wont let them have peace" he said

will that solve your problem" i asked
no" he said

"may be working hard and putting the same energy in a constructive side can lead you towards a much brighter future.
what has happend in the past was a mistake of not making a career goal properly. you still have a long life to live and i think you should make a plan now.
isnt." i aksed

yes" he said

there are millions like him who started a journey without a goal.
its never too late to make a goal in life.
make it today and work on it.
prince

set your goal!

Here’s a simple exercise to gain clarity about what you want to achieve.

1. What do you want specifically?
2. Where are you now?
3. How will you know when you have it? What will you see, hear and feel when you have it?
4. What will this outcome get for you or allow you to do?
5. Where, when and with whom will you be doing it (with)?
6. What do you have now to assist you in getting this outcome? Resources? Resourcefulness?
7. What additional resources do you need?
8. For what purpose do you want this?
9. What will happen (that you might gain/lose) if you have/get it?
10. What might happen if you don’t get it?
11. What might not happen if you get it?
12. What might not happen if you don’t get it?
13. What is your first step toward this goal?

prince gera

Celine Dion - Because You Loved Me lyrics

praise the lord for the lord he has given you..

कहानी

एक बार मैं अपने एक दोस्त के साथ एक बैंक गया. काउंटर पर एक घंटे खड़े रहने के बाद जब नंबर आया तो काउंटर पैर बैठी महिला ने बेवजह बहुत रूखे से बात की और सिर्फ जरा सा सवाल पूछने पर चिल्ला पड़ी...मेरा दोस्त भी अपना आप खो बैठा..इससे पहले की कुछ होता..मैंने उसे कोने में बुलाया और बताया..इस महिला की बेटी की शादी एक हफ्ते पहले हुयी थी और शादी के तीन दिन बाद ही लड़के वालों ने उसे घर भेज दिया ...शायद दहेज़ के लिए...यह अपने पति को बहुत पहले ही खो चुकी है..अब अपने भविष्य को लेकर चिंतित है और दिन बार बैंक में रह कर भी अपने बॉस से डांट खाती है.. यह बहुत दुःख से गुजर रही है . इसके इस व्यहवार के लिए इसे माफ़ कर दो..
मेरा दोस्त शर्मिंदा हुआ और उसने उस महिला से कुछ नहीं कहा. उसके मन में एक अच्छा भाव आ गया और उसे उसका डाटना या रूखे मुहं बात करना अब इतना नहीं चुभ रहा था.

ऐसा कुछ नहीं था. उस महिला की बेटी और पति को मैं नहीं जानता. मगर इतना जरुर जानता हूँ की उसे लोगो से रूखे बात करने का शौक नहीं है. शायद उसके हालात ही ऐसे है.
बुरा कोई नहीं होता सिर्फ हालात बुरे होते है.
लोगों को उनके व्यहवार की बजाये उनकी नीयत या उनकी उस काम को करने के पीछे छुपी वजह से पहचानिए.
हर काम के पीछे वजह हमेशा सकरात्मक ही होती है.
यहाँ तक की चोर भी अपनी चोरी की वजह को सकरात्मक समझता है.
चोरी कर के वो अपने बच्चों को पालना चाहता है या फिर शायद अपने भविष्य की चिंतायों को दूर करने के लिए आज पैसा जोड़ना चाहता है.

अपनों को उनके बात करने के तरीके या उठने बैठने के भाव से न जांचे
उनके उस व्यहवार के पीछे छुपी वजह, प्यार, डर या किसी और भाव की वजह समझे...
हम सब खुश रहना चाहते है पर या तो हमारा मन बीते कल में अटका रहता है ..या आने वाले कल को सोच में अटके रहते है..
प्रिन्स गेरा

खोने का डर या प्यार

खोने का डर या प्यार
मैंने कई रिश्ते देखे हैं जहाँ रिश्ते की बुनियाद ही डर है. हर इंसान एक आज़ाद आत्मा है जो अपनी इच्छा से इस दुनिया में आई है. अपने इस दुनिया में आने के दिन से लेकर जाने के दिन को भी उसने खुद तय किया है. वो आज़ाद है जितना हम उसे बांधते या काबू करने के कोशिश करते है शायद उतना ही वो खीझती है.
चाहे फिर वो बच्चा हो, एक प्रेमी या माँ बाप भी क्यों ना हो.
हम सभी को प्यार पाना पसंद है पर अगर वो प्यार हमें अपने हिसाब से चलाने लगे तो वो गले में फसने लगता है. जहाँ डर है प्यार वहां नहीं रहता. वह मत जायो लडको से बात मत करो, यह मत पहनो, फ़ोन पे बात मत करो..वगेरह वगेरह ...यह प्यार नहीं खोने का डर है...यह आने वाले कल का डर है..अपनी आँखें बंद कर के एक बेहतरीन कल के बारे में सोचिये.. आपका प्यार आपके अपने को एक सुरक्षा कवच भी दे सकता है. उससे कहिये तुम कहीं भी जाओ , जो भी करो मेरा प्यार तुम्हे हमेशा सुरक्षा देगा.. उस ऊपर वाले पर भरोसा रखो...नाई के हाथ में उस्तरा देख कर क्यों नहीं सोचते की यह मेरी गर्दन काट देगा...नहीं तो फिर उपरवाले पर ही शक क्यूँ.. और अगर मेरे भाग्य में क्या है यह कोई नहीं जानता तो कम से कम उसके बारे में सोचने की क्षमता तो मुझमें है. अगर तुम्हारे मन में पीला रंग है तो हर जगह तुम्हे पीला ही दिखेगा ...ठीक वैसे ही अगर आज सोचना ही है तो क्यों ना अच्छा सोचे ...हर रोज़ कल्पना करे एक बेहतरीन कल की...जो सच में बहुत ख़ूबसूरत है.. कल सुंदर होगा अगर आज सुंदर है तो...और आज अगर दुखी है तो कल यकीकन और भी दुखी मिलेगा..अगर कल ख़ुशी चाहिए तो आज अपने मन में ख़ुशी लानी होगी...वर्ना शायद हम गलत लाइन में खड़े है...नहीं क्या...

मन की शक्ति ..

आपकी मनपसंद चोकलेट को देख केर अचानक ही आपकी जीभ पर उसका स्वाद आ जाता है.
उसे चखे बिना ही आप उसे अपनी जीभ पर महसूस करने लगते है
हैं ना?
तो क्या वो स्वाद उस चोकलेट में है या आपके मन यानि आपके mind में
अगर वो स्वाद आपके मन में है तो यक़ीनन वो कभी ना कभी आपके मन में गया होगा
जिसका तरह हो आपके मन में रिकॉर्ड हुआ है उसी तरह उसे डिलीट भी किया जा सकता है !
जैसे किसी को खो देने पर हमें या तो उसके साथ बिताया हुआ कल याद आता है या फिर उसके साथ सोचा गया भविष्य
दोनों ही बहुत दुख देते है
दरअसल यह दर्द नज़र नहीं आता मगर इसका दर्द कितना तेज है वोह इससे गुजरने वाला ही जानता है
सब कुछ आपके मन में है
सारी यादें, सारे स्वाद और सारे emotions , और सारे डर, जलन, और हर वोह चीज़ जो वर्तमान को प्रभावित करती है......
जो भी मन ने सिखा है उसे भुलाया जा सकता है और जो उसे सिखाना है सिखाया जा सकता है
किसी को देख कर चिढने की बजाय अपने मन को सिखाया जा सकता है की वो उसे देख कर अच्छा महसूस करे..
यही है शायद २१वी सदी की सबसे बड़ी खोज में से एक
हमने बचपन से सुना है प्रथानायो में
हमको मन की शक्ति देना मन विजय करें....
मन के हारे हार है मन के जीते जीत ...
अपने मन पे जीत पाईये और देखिये यह दुनिया एक बेहतरीन जगह बनती चली जाएगी

सोच अभी हकीक़त नहीं बनी...तो क्यों ना उसे सोच में बदल दिया जाये ..हकीक़त खुद ब खुद बदल जाएगी...
जब सोचना ही है तो अच्छा सोचेंगे... कम से कम चिंता नाम की चिता पे जलने से तो बचेंगे...
एक विद्यार्थी .....

मेरे पिता के लिए!!!

पापा
आप सो रहे है! मुझे लगा ये शायद सही वक़्त नही ,
पर क्या करू अब रुका नही जाता!
अब इस बोझ को खुद पर लेकर कैसे सो पाऊंगा मैं !

किस मिटटी के बने है आप! पराया भी कोई चिल्ला जाए तो दुःख लगता है, पर मैं तो अपना होकर भी आपको बेईज्ज़त करता रहा !
आज आपके पास बैठने आया हूँ ! सब कुछ भूल चूका था मैं !
पर धुंधला सही , सब कुछ याद आ रहा है !



हर बार खाने के टेबल पर थके हारे आते , मुस्कुराते और मेरा हाल हाल पूछते हो आप !

याद है आपको साइकिल चलाते समय कितनी बार गिरता था मैं, पर फिर भी आप सब्र नहीं खोते थे !
सुबह से शाम तक आप भागते हो , हर मेरे कपड़ो के लिए खर्च उठाते हो, पर मुझे याद नही कब अपने लिए कुछ लाये हो आप !

जब छोटा था मैं, तो रातो को रोता था, पर फिर भी अपनी गोद में लेकर घुमाते थे आप मुझको !
कहीं भी जाऊं मैं, आप साया बनकर साथ चलते रहे !
जब भी खाने बाहर गये , हमेशा मेरी पसंद को चुना ! पहले मेरी पसंद का खाने आया और आपने उसी को अपना समझ कर खाया !


मुझे तो याद नही आपने कब अपने लिए कुछ ख़रीदा हो !
आपके सारे सपने मुझसे ही जुड़े है , कभी नहीं कहा की मेरे लिए कुछ बनाकर दिखाओ ! बस यही कहा की जो भी बनना , खुश रहना !
मैं कितना मतलबी हूँ, मैंने कभी आपसे पुछा तक नही की कैसे है आप ??
काश, कभी मैं भी आपके पास बैठता जैसे आप बैठते थे हमेशा मेरे पास !
मेरे पास बैठ कर आप घंटो कहानिया सुनाते, शायद कितनी बार मैं एक सवाल पूछता पर आप फिर भी उतनी ही विनम्रता से जवाब देते !

पापा मैं आप जैसा कभी नहीं बन सकूंगा !
खुशनसीब हूँ जो मुझे आप जैसे पिता मिले !
कभी पसीने से तर-बतर होकर भी आपने मुझे गर्मी महसूस नही होने दी !
ठण्ड की रातो में भी मेरी रजाई पहले डाली !
शायद ही ज़िन्दगी का कोई लम्हा हो जब आप मेरे बराबर खड़े न हुए
और मैं मतलबी सिर्फ अपने बारे मैं सोचता रहा
आप नहीं समझोगे कह कर चिल्लात्ता रहा
और फिर भी वही खड़े रहे मेरे लिए

कभी सामने से प्यार न कर सके तो
तो रात को सोते समय मेरे सर पे हाथ फेर जाते थे आप

क्यूँ नहीं दिखा मुझे वो सब
क्यों दुनिया को ही देखता रहा मैं
क्यों अपने दोस्तों और अपनी खुशियों को अपनी दुनिया समझता रहा
क्यों नहीं दिखा मुझे वोह इंसान जिसकी दुनिया शुरू ही मुझ पर हुई
और शायद ख़त्म भी मुझ पर होगी

एक दिन आएगा जब शायद यह सब कहने के लिए बहुत देर हो जाएगी...
कोई नहीं टोकेगा मुझे मेरी लापरवाहियों के लिए ...
कोई नहीं देगा मुझे सलाह मेरी परेशानियों के लिए ...


पर अब नहीं अब नाम से नहीं लहू से आपका बेटा बन के दिखाऊंगा मैं
आपकी हर ख़ुशी मेरी मंजिल होगी और आपका हर सपना मेरा मुकाम
अब अपनी बाकी की ज़िन्दगी मेरा एक ही सपना होगा
आपके सपनो को पूरा करना

आपका बेटा

prince gera
from the book i intend to write :चंद चिठियाँ ऐसी भी.....

चंद चिठियाँ ऐसी भी

एक बेटे के पिता के लिए

कैसे हो दोस्त. शायद हम एक दुसरे को नहीं जानते पर एक रिश्ता है जो जोड़ता है हमें एक दुसरे से.
शायद कल मेरी गुड़िया तुम्हारे घर की बिटिया बनेगी

कुछ कहना चाहता हूँ मैं तुमसे. तुम्हे सिर्फ इसलिए क्यूंकि तुम ही समझोगे
क्यूंकि मेरी तरह तुम भी एक पिता हो
तुम समजते हो कैसा लगता है जब वो नन्हा फ़रिश्ता आँखें खोलता है अपने पिता की गोद में. उसकी उम्मीद भरी अनकहें कुछ वादे मांग लेती है, वादे की ख्याल रखेंगे हम उसका.
कल जब वोह तुम्हारे घर आएगी.
भोली है बेचारी .
सब समझने में थोड़ी तो देर लगेगी.
उसे शायद मालूम न हो तुम्हारे घर के रीती रिवाज़.
हो सकता है कुछ वक़्त मांगे वो नए रंग में ढलने के लिए.
उसे मालूम न हो तुम्हारी पसंद और ना समझे वो जीने का नया ढंग

हो सकता है तुम्हारी बेटी की तरह वो भी कभी देर तक सो जाये
या कभी काम की परेशानियों के चलते घर देर से आये. समझा दूंगा उसे
हो सकता है उसे न मालूम
हो तुम्हारे रिश्तेदारों के नाम
हो सकता है मालूम न हो उसे घर के छोटे छोटे काम
समझा दूंगा उसे
कभी कभी रात को डर जाती है
कभी माँ के आँचल को पकड़ के सो जाती है
उसकी माँ उससे बहुत प्यार करती है
उसने सीचा है अपने शरीर में
यह रिश्ता तो भुलाये नहीं भूलता

हो सकता है उसे कभी माँ की याद सताए
कभी कभी वो उससे मिलने भी चली आये
तुम माफ़ कर देना उस माँ की गलती को
फिर भी समझा दूंगा उसे
हो सकता है उसका मन
करे सहेलियों से मिलने का
भाई के माथे को तिलक करने का
या बहन के हाथों को पकड़ घंटों बैठने का
दरअसल ये रिश्ते बहुत पुराने है
इन्हें भूलने की मोहलत तो दे दोगे ना

खेलना पसंद है उसको
फिर भी समझा देना अपने रीती रिवाज़ जरुर समझ जाएगी

कभी कभी गुस्सा हो जाती है मुझ पर भी
गुस्सा तो पागलपन है उसे पागल समझ के भुला तो दोगे ना

हर लड़की की तरह वो भी सपने देखती है
वो भी आएगी आपके घर
नया नाम, घर और नया वजूद अपनाने
सपनो को भूलने की मोहलत तो दे देगो न

पिता और बेटी का रिश्ता सबसे पवित्र रिश्ता है
हर पिता अपनी बेटी को अपने से ज्यादा चाहता है
मैं भी चाहता हूँ पर क्या करूँ थोडा डरपोक हूँ ना इसलिए खुल कर कह ना सका उससे
आप तो कह दोगे ना

जब देर आती है तो चिल्ला देता हूँ उस पर
दरअसल बता नहीं पता उसे की क्या है वो मेरे लिए
उसकी नन्ही उगलियों को पकड़ के चलना सिखाया है मैंने उसको
कैसे कहूं की मेरा हर सपना बंधा है उससे

पर जानता हूँ जब जाएगी इस आँगन से तो फूट फूट के रोऊँगा मैं
मैं तो बाप हूँ मेरा क्या है
उसे तो ढलने की मोहलत दे दोगे ना

आप तो बड़े है
नाराज भी होगे तो माफ़ तो कर दोगे ना

औलाद की कोई कीमत नहीं
इसकी कीमत कोई लगा भी नहीं सकता
फिर भी एक बाप के लिए अपनी सबसे कीमती दौलत खुद से जुदा करना कितना मुश्किल होगा
तुम जरुर समझोगे

फिर भी समझा दूंगा उसे

एक बेटी का पिता

its a letter from the book i intend to write
hope people like it
prince gera

read minds!

communication is 24x7 process. you cannot NOT communicate.
we communicate even when we dont communicate delibrately.
it can be in any form a smile, a silence or even a stare.
ignorance too is a form of communication. remember the last time your parents got upset with you. they uttered no word still you could sense it.
we have a tendency of evaluating people with on their behavior whereas we analyze ourselves on our intentions.
behavior is something which is visible on screen the actual programming takes place in the CPU i.e. mind.
nothing happens for no reason. everything happens with a reason.even when we utter a sentence there is a reason behind it.
a thought that provokes us to speak.
kids judge their parents on their behavior but we must understand the underlying intention.
even a thief assumes his intention to be nice. he assumes that he will steal and by this he will make his family happy. so for him, his intention is just too good.

when you start judging others with their intention it will give you a new perspective to understand others.
then by asking some question you can always get to know what is in their mind.

try this...a boy is driving too fast and then he comes behind your car and stats blowing horn.
you surely will feel irritated.
you will assume that he is just showing or is very impatient
you might even pass a judgment calling him a fool or stupid.

alright lets change the situation.
imagine you were that boy, in what circumstances you would have behaved like that.
you will say "when i am in hurry"
i need to take my mother to an hospital or even when i want to access washroom as soon as possible.

wow, now just assume a similar situation for that man, your irritation will fade away you might even give him a side assuming he will piss in his pants else...

try this intention on your relations it will give a new light..
prince gera

The Secret:Positive Thinking & Bring abundance to your life!

love or fear

i have come across some many relations where fear plays a prominent part.
every human comes with an independent free will so the more you try to control this free will the more it agitates.
be it a child,a lover or say even parents. we all liked to be loved but the time we are controlled we tend to loose the charm in that relation.
people often control others because they are afraid of loosing them.
afraid means they have fear.
any relation that has fear the love automatically fades away and begins the stress and anxiety.
make sure your love is wrapped in warmth and affection not fear and anxiety.

prince gera

cravings!!!!

your subconscious mind has it all.
be it your habits, memories, past traumas or even images of future events that causes anxiety.
anything that goes in subconscious goes in like a program.
this program can be reprogrammed or even deprogrammed.
we react to things with our own internal representations and these representation can always be altered.
in a simple language imagine yourself craving for a bite of chocolate and it doesnt taste the same when you bite it next time.
would you crave for it...certainly not.'
taste is not the image of chocolate it is in your mind and this taste can always be changed or removed so next time when you eat the chocolate it may taste like a rotten egg.
this technique really helps people to get a control over their diet.
it is the boon for weight management cases..
prince gera

right or wrong?

hi it feels great to introduce a new writer on the blog.
kiran deep is a sister of mine and she thinks too much so i asked to her ventilate her ideas on this blog...


Does karma really exist, if exist then who decides?

Almost every Indian school of thought believes in karma. The Sanskrit word Karma literally means action --or "work," "deed," "function," etc.. In Buddhism however, karma mainly refers to one's intention or motivation while doing an action.

But, does karma mean only action, or it includes intentions or thought?

Or, does it include action without intention?

Or, it doesn’t exist at all, as according to Carvaka?

It is generally said that actions performed consciously are weighted more heavily than those done unconsciously. But just as poison affects us if taken unknowingly, suffering caused unintentionally will also give appropriate karmic effect.

There can be four ways through which one begets Karma:
• through thoughts
• through words
• through one's actions
• through actions others do under one's instructions
'Karma' is an Indian religious concept in contradiction to 'faith' espoused by Abrahamic religions (Judaism, Christianity, and Islam), which view all human dramas as the will of God as opposed to present - and past - life actions. In theistic schools of Hinduism, humans have free will to choose good or evil and suffer the consequences, which require the will of God to implement karma's consequences, unlike Buddhism or Jainism which does not accord any role to a supreme God or gods.

In Buddhism, it is stated that the theory of karma should not be confused with ‘moral justice’ or ‘reward and punishment’. The idea of moral justice arises out of the conception of a supreme being, a God, who sits in judgment, who is a law-giver and who decides what is right and wrong.

In Buddhism, the theory of karma is the theory of cause and effect, of action and reaction; it is a natural law, which has nothing to do with the idea of justice or reward and punishment. Every volitional action produces its effects or results. If a good action produces good effects, it is not justice, or reward, meted out by anybody or any power sitting in judgment of your action, but this is in virtue of its own nature, its own law.
According to Sikhism, this life is likened to a field (Khet) in which our Karma is the seed. We harvest exactly what we sow. No less, no more. This infallible law of Karma holds everyone responsible for what the person is or going to be.
In short almost all systems of Indian philosophy believe that our karma decides our future. In other words, if we will perform good karma then we will get good result, and if we will perform bad karma then we will get bad results.
But question is: who will decide what is good and what is bad.
We human beings are always concern with the question ‘what is right and wrong?’ The question what is right and what is wrong, or what is good and what is bad is very complicated and very debatable and very controversial question.
Different people give different answers to this question.

Some says, “our religious beliefs are enough to tell us, what is right or wrong."
On the other hand, according to some, “law is requiring to tell us, what is right or wrong."
While according to some “our society tells us, what is right or wrong."
And, some can also reply: “I don't know what the world means to tell us, what is right or wrong."

But, can religion, law society rules or intuition really tell us what is right and wrong?

Kirandeep Kour
Masters in Philosophy
University of Delhi

LOVE story!!!

(A girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on a motorcycle)
Girl: Slow
down. Im scared.
Guy: No this is fun.
Girl: No its not. Please, its to scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.
(Girl hugs him)
Guy: Can u take my helmet off and put it on? Its bugging me.

In the paper the next day: A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on the motorcycle, but only one survived.
The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his breaks broke, but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him, felt her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so she would live even though it meant he would die.

what is your state

what is your state and choose which emotion is driving your right now?
prince gera

still wondering!!

have been planning to write a lot. but no clue what to ventilate. soon i have an intellect in philosphy joining me in this blog.
hope she writes soon...
prince gera

real tough one

i received this email day before yesterday.
this boy has got his marriage fixed with a girl. he wants to fall in love with her.
he says she is not the one he always imagined his wife to be.
now how can he reprogram his mind to find great things about that girl.

will see what happens..

become a magnet

want people to feel attracted towards you.
there is very easy technique. just take interest in their life, their choices and even their joy and sorrow.
see how different you feel them and how differently they respond.
prince gera

remove your guilt

hello
i just had a wonderful session.
the fellow had a strange hate towards women.
we both remained awestruck when we came across the reason.
you never know what your mind shows.

finally he could detect the problem and get rid of it.
prince gera

haunting past

thats one of the area where a lot of people spend major time.
can you get anything out of it.
i agree you have done wrong in the past and now you feel bad to remember it.
it can be a failed relationship or even a bad business plan.

so what whatever you was an experiment that has helped you to learn more and grow wisely.
just get the best of it and live the moment you are in.

learn from the past and move with the present towards a wonderful career.

prince gera

thanks a ton everyone

i owe my thanks to all the students of 2010 batch who came a get togehter on friday 18th june 2010 at cia campus.
my special thanks to manoj kumar, sanjay behl and their team for organising everything.
hope everyone had fun
prince gera

i want success.!!!

you keep pink color in your mind. go to market and now let me know what color you see in stores.
i am sure pink.
hasnt it happend to you before.
when you planned your car or even to paint your house.
you starting finding that car model very much road or even noticed people getting their house painted.

thats it.
you will see only what you have in your mind.
now see and write what you want in your life, i am sure success. success that will lead you to comfort and that comfort will give you happiness.

what an irony.
you want happiness in life as the final essence of your success and at the same time you have worry in your mind.
this worry is leading you to anxiety and restlessness.
and when you have worry in your mind all the time what do you see..?
i am sure you have got the answer.

prince gera

gain confidence, remove fears or even lose weight

Going on Holiday? Does the Prospect of the Flight Terrify You?
I was recently approached by a girl who had suffered from a severe fear of water for most of her life. Her words bore some familiar hallmarks: she was skeptical as to whether I could help.

Besides being unable to get in water with her family on holidays, her fear could be triggered by watching water falls or by merely thinking of going in water.
. More and more people are turning to hypnosis as it is a natural and normal process, and it works. Below are some typical answers to allay some of the fears, mystery and myths surrounding hypnosis.

What is hypnosis? It's an altered state of awareness which allows us to contact a relaxed, responsive state of mind.

Shall I be aware of what's happening?Yes, the predominant feeling of most people is It didn't work for me, I was only very relaxed. You too, will feel very relaxed.

So, I am not asleep then? No, you are extremely relaxed, similar to the moment before you fall asleep at night.

If I'm aware and relaxed could I be influenced to do anything against my will or nature? No, in fact you would be shocked out of the relaxed state immediately any such action was suggested to you. It is inconceivable that any harm could befall on an individual. You are fully in control and will hear everything that is said to you. Indeed, the centuries-old technique of hypnosis is being used increasingly as an adjunct to orthodox medicine, relieving stress and controlling pain.

Are there some people you cannot hypnotise? Most people can change state, some more easily than others. However, I don't treat people who are under the influence of alcohol or drugs.

How many visits will I need? depends maximum can be 7-8.

So why is it so successful? When you are relaxed the critical part of your conscious mind has relaxed too. Our conscious mind is the part which is logical, analytical and intellectual. We bypass this critical factor to access your imagination and creativity. This is your unconscious mind. The therapist then gives the unconscious mind positive suggestions for your well being. This enables you to achieve greater self-awareness which enables you to tap into your own inner resources.

How can hypnosis help? The following conditions and symptoms can be successfully treated:

Anxiety, Eating Disorders, Stress Migraines, Insomnia,
Relaxation, Fear of Flying, Lack of Self Confidence, Blushing,
Shy Bladder, Paranoia, Slimming, Smoking, Nail Biting,
Childhood Trauma, Social Fears, Nervousness,
Post Natal Depression,
Guilt, IBS, Allergies, Exam Nerves,
Phobias, Self Esteem, Panic Attacks,memory gain, concentration increase
Sports Motivation and Achievement,
Goal Setting, Panic Attacks, Grief,
and many more...


prince gera
hypnotherapist and NLP practitioner

cheating in love

case 3

he met her in a party. she was gorgeous. he approached her and started a conversation. he started dating her and liked her company.
after spending sometime together he started feeling very mushy.
the good days began. the best part of life began. late night talks, promises, swears and ice cream treats and even gifts.
faith gained on both the sides.
now they went physical. both had the best time of their life. everytime was a new pleasure....

time passed. just like the way you feel for your new car after some months or how the tea tastes you when just had a candy. its tasteless.

he doesnt enjoy her anymore. as he feels saturated. he wants something new may be for an hour a day to keep his life exciting.
he starts dating someone else secretly and now the old one sounds boring.
late night talks are cut to minutes and minutes into long arguments of complain and ignorance.

the more they fight, the more he feels close the new girl.
he wants to tell the old one how he feels now but is afraid of breaking her heart.
he hides from new one and lives in stress.

he doesnt want to break her heart and carry a guilt in him for the rest of his life.
and if he doesnt tell her he is actually feeling more guilt about it.

the point is even if he lives the last one, can he leave that guilt.
or even if he goes back to her can he get the same thrill back. the thrill which he had in him the day he met her for the first time.

can he feel the same about her. can he be refreshed and remove all experiences from his mind. so that he can feel the same thrill in his mind every time he meets her.

if it happens then nothing like that. because the other option seems useless. today he is looking for other option tommorow he will look for another option. or there is a possiblity that the girl will look for another option as she also feels that the thrill is missing.

sometimes in such cases i have seen. the boy develops are fear in his heart that if he has cheated a girl in past. why cant his present partner cheat on him. this fear leads towards stress and suspect. it further lead the other partner to cheat.

his mind can be reprogrammed. the way his mind learned in the same pattern his mind can unlearn also.
he can feel the same excitement once again with this life partner.

he just need to be ready to have it back..

doubt in relationship

i come across many couples who complain me about their partners posessiveness and some even compain about how unfaithful there partners are.

case1: she should not talk to boys or should not even make an id on social networking sites?

"why" i asked

"i dont like it" the answer came

"why dont you like it" he said

"still, there must be a reason you dont like it for" i asked

"why she needs to speak to someone, am not i sufficient" he replied
"you are very much sufficient and since she lives in a society she is bound to speak to many others too. talking to others doesnt mean that she wants to be with all of them" i asked

"but not with boys" he said
"why not boys" i asked

"boys take advantage of girls, they are not good and they use dumb girls like her" he said
"how do you know that" i asked
"i know" he said
"how" i asked
"i have seen many cases" he said
"you have many cases or you also do like that" i asked
"no i dont do that but i know it happens" he said
"has something happend in the past" i asked
"no, not really" he answered
"see even if a boy approaches her for a relationship she will refuse him. being good looking or attractive is not a crime and is not even her mistake. if a boy approaches she will simply say i am commited. " i said
"no, boys are clever they know how to flatter. she will agree when they will convince her" he said
"how can you be so sure" i asked
"because i also have convinced many" he said

here he is. since he has been like this always. he also assumes other boys to be like that only.
he assumes other boys would also be a flirt like him who tries a hand on almost everyone.

it is not neccessarly in all cases.
may be he has not done anything in the past but has seen his friends doing this.
or he has seen this happening to his friends.
or he has seen this in a movie or read a book.
he has experienced in last relationship
or the girl has already done it in the past.

so in all cases there was a "FEAR" controlling this relationship.
he required severe change in his thinking patterns because of continous flow of negative thoughts he find his partner highly unfaithful.


case 2
he likes her.
she is a flirt and he has caught her many times flirting around with others.
when he cross questions her she swears on him and convinces him.
things become normal after some hours or days fight.
he shouts on her and abuses her then he only calls her says sorry.

he loves her but at the same time he doubts on her. when this doubts comes in his mind he hates her again.
she is always in his mind and he keeps checking her minute after minute. when she says are you spying on me he says i care for you.

he doesnt know why she flirts.
he says he will feel very relaxed when she admits that she is a cheat. he is only waiting and slogging this relationship till the day she confesses about her relationship with someone else.

he is living a life full of stress. he is compulsory obsessed with her.
he wants to be with her but has no faith on her. as there has been many incidents in the past and now his faith is in shrecks.

he doesnt know what to do? he lives his life in pain. this pain is more than 1000 bone fractures but is not visible anywhere on the body.

we need to find out where it started from.
why did he like a flirt.
is he a flirt too.
how does he think that every time she talks to a boy, she flirts.
why does he think that she will get into a new relation

on top of all what does he want?
he wants to be happy.
and he wants her to live with him happily.
can she live happily with him when he is so unhappy

he needs a severe change in his living pattern.
he has to become a happy man.
believe me you attract happy people around you only if you are happy.


prince gera

how to propose her/him

a boy asked me that he wants to propose a girl.
i asked proposed for what?
"i want to tell her what i feel about her" he replied.
"what do you feel" i aksed
"i really like her and want to be with her for some time, may be a coffee or something" he said
"go ahead and tell her, that you like her and you want to treat her with a coffee" i replied
"what if she reacts bad" he said
"why will she react bad" i asked
"she will think cheap of me and will think that i am a bad boy who is irritating her" he said

"is that your intention" i asked
"not at all" he said
"then where is the problem. tell her your intentions. she should know before she conceives her own thoughts" i said
ok" he said
"what do you want from her. do you want a marriage, pyhsical pleasure or just want to know her more" i asked
"no marriage i just want to meet her and spend some time to know her" he said
"do you love her"i asked
its too early to say, i have just seen her couple of times and dont even know her nature, choices and even likings" he said

"go ahead" i said
"i dont know what she will say" he said
"what is the worst" i asked

"she will say no" he said
"no to what. to your feelings for her. your emotions or to go for a coffee or talk on mobile" i asked
"to my proposal" he said
"proposal? what proposal, you said you want to express your emotions to her. go ahead and do that. you did not tell me that you want something in return." i asked
"i want to propose and ofcourse i want things in return" he said
"then thats not love or liking. thats purely a conditional deal you want to make with her. that deal is giving you fear as well as a feeling of being rejected or refused.if you like her or like anything special in her just go and tell her. if she also feels the same she would surely speak to you about it. if she doesnt why do you want to force her to love you or like you. and in return you behave silly that will surely make mockery of your liking." i said

"i got it. i was considering my feelings as love. whereas its nothing but a desire of feeling physical sensation. if i love or like her it should not matter what she replies to me. her reply wouldnt affect my love for her. i will tell her my heart its ok how she reacts. i respect her so i will say it in a decent way. i will go to her and tell her i like being with her. i like the way she dresses up. the way she talks to everyone. i wish i could be with person like her and feel very happy about it. i will tell her that she has no compulsion to feel the same about me.my love for her would remain the same and i assure her that i will not do anything that brings disgrace to her or her emotions. love is eternal it doesnt need a physical approval or private meetings, mushy moments or even hands together. it is felt and it remains in you forever" he said

"how do you feel now" i asked
"wow, i will just go and tell her" he said
"how will she react" i asked
"she will react as if someone has told her how good she is and thats how she should be throughout her life. she will feel really wonderful" he said
"go ahead and all the best" i said

he left the room and i could see confidence in him. now if he goes and proposes her its a wonderful love of him.
if he feels that he wants her physical approval and wants a right on her. she should belong to him only, the feeling of control comes in. she is a love of him not a commodity. you cannot make a person do something until and unless he or she wants to do that.
remember there is a difference in humans and materials. she is is a human not an article you can posess.

prince gera

HESITATION:does it hold you!

hesitation
lets do an exercise.
think of an apple. what image comes in your mind. surely an apple.
now when i say you "dont think of apple " what comes in your mind. i am sure apple again.
now again i say dont think of an apple.
i am sure you still are thinking about apple.

this is where the hesitation works on. you dont want this hesitation or fear but you still think about it all the time.even when you are working to improve it you still have it in your mind thats why you see it coming back to you again and again.

now lets try this. instead of saying dont think about an apple, i say you to think of an orange.
now what comes in your mind. an orange for sure.

thats what it is. you dont want to feel hesitant but you still think about it everyday and say i dont want to be hesitant....


what this hesitation is:
hesitation is a natural phenomenon.it like a self defense mechanism.
we all feel hesitant to new people, new places, routes, drives and even situations.
the degree of this hesitation may vary from person to person and situations too.

the another side of hesitation is feeling inferiority or worrying about your image. what will people think about me when i do this.

i have a very simple approach to it. first ask yourself what will people think about you. let the images come in your mind. hear what you hear and feel how you feel about it.
now just imagine yourself doing what you want to do and see people reacting very normally to it. and see how you feel.

in some cases you feel inferior and you want to show others how inferior you are feeling. this is a big trouble. you must accept what you are and as you are. you will feel very relaxed.
for example you go into a big coffee shop with some friends of your cousins. they talk about menu and look at you. you dont know the menu and have never been to a place like this. you tend to lose your confidence and hope that they dont discuss the menu with you. because if they ask you for a dish you will fall flat and they will get to know the fact that you are an alien to such an ambience.
the best part would be you go ahead and tell them that you are new to this place and since the other members are more familier to this. ask them for suggestions on menu and even ask them to explain you the dishes and you listen curiously.
now they dont have to show that they are superior because you have already called them superior.
it gives them a chance to share their knowledge with you and you get a mentor.

in another situation you may feel hesitant of thinking about the result of the action you intend to perform.
you can close your eyes and play a movie of you doing that act. you can add music as per your choice or even reactions of people observing you.
its is a neuro programming exercise to create instant confidence.

what the world thinks about you its their problem. and as long as you are not hurting anyone, you must feel happy doing what are doing.


accept yourself as you are and be what you are. dont blend. tell people also to accept you as you are.

as you spend more time doing that act you automatically become more confident.
now go ahead and live to the fullest.

speak your point with a conviction and genuinees in your heart.

prince gera

presentation skills

now that's interesting area i would love to speak about. i have been into numerous presentations and have personally delivered presentations in various management, engineering and other vocational institutions.
i come across various ways of presentation, some are formal some are very informal.
some talk about products, services, informational and even motivational presentation.\
every time when we think of a presentation. a formal setting comes in our mind. an image of lot of people in audience and may be a presenter or two.

the role of a presenter is to speak and audience since the name suggests is there to listen.
i remember my school days when my chemistry teacher would come and shout in the class.
"SILENCE" was the word she would shout ironically she used to make the maximum noise.
and taking advantage of that noise we would make more noise.

what she preached was completely against what she wanted others to practice.
similarly in a presentation a presenter becomes a preacher and expects other to become a listener which generally doesn't happen.

now i ask you?
do you remember all presentations you attended?
no,i am sure.
do you remember all the slides at the end?
no for sure

ok then what presentations do you remember?
what kind of emotions come in your mind when you think of that presentation.
do you laugh remembering the jokes presenter cracked?
do you get into tears remembering the pain he discussed about?
feel patriotic
even feel scared

do you remember a presentation that didn't arouse any emotion in you.
no, not really.
do you remember what happened on 17 July 2003
no, but do you remember your school farewell party, first date, or any day when you were beaten up by your parents or some bullies.
yes

so every day and every moment that has some emotions attached to it becomes very much vivid and clear to us. we can remember them for long years rest gets washed away.

now that`s the pulse. every presentation has to arouse some emotions in audience so that they remember it for too long. all wonderful orators in the history knew about it and they even knew how to do that.
emotions in the presentation can be of many kind. humor being the safest rest depends on the situation.

for an excellent presentation

1. remember you have to speak less and listen more. as much as you can involve the audience.
2. your presentation must carry an emotion if it is not available add humor in it.

3. relate it with the audience. let them decide how it can benefit them. they should be able to relate the benefits .

4. design your questions to get the desired answers.

5. avoid arguments and conflict in between the presentation.

6. accept your weakness as it is and defend it with some other wonderful points.

7. make sure the jokes you crack are not judgmental in nature and should create no offense.

8. prepared yourself to handle objections.


example:

get in the hall and greet the audience with a smile. feel good about yourself and let the enthusiasm of meeting audience flow on your face. after all presentation is all about transferring the enthusiasm from presenter to audience.

begin your topic with questions of different kind to relate yourself and your presentation with audience.

for example:
how many of you know what x product is?
and many other questions.
praise the audience on their answers and appreciate their knowledge with being judgmental.
after gathering the information you may get the direction of your presentation, the core areas and areas to be addressed.

remember you will be able to feel that enthusiasm only you are convinced with what you are presenting or else you are only preaching.

lets say you are here to sell brand X.
normally a presenter will speak about his brand X.
that`s what he is supposed to ignoring the fact that there are chances of audience showing ignorance to it.



take a fresh side of it.
you are here to talk about product X. now lets begin asking the audience about the product they like. you will see audience giving mixed reactions like product B,C,D.
now that is what they have in their mind. it is already loaded in their mind.
now even if you speak for hours they can not allocate your words anywhere in mind as it is already occupied by the previous product.

now your job begins to unload it. ask them what they like about b,c or d. talk good about what they like. be like them. become their mirror and speak what they speak about their choices.
for example he says brand d has 10 service centers tell him that it doesn't only have 10 service centers in fact it has great re sale too.
so it may sound silly that you have come here to give presentation on X but you talking of every other brand.

yes my dear, you are talking of every other brand because your audience wants to talk about it. once they have spoken about it. that means that have already unloaded what was in their mind.
they have given you the codes also what makes them like that product. this listening process has also given you an idea of their respective buying or choosing behavior.
now you can talk about your product or presentation highlighting the features as per their choice.
it will help you to talk in their language. the language they understand the most.
now they have an empty mind and now its your turn to load it and believe me you dont have to face objections or comparisons.


problem number two:
a person in the presentation stands up and says "your product has the worst quality".
an instant reaction of a presenter would be of an advocate and will begin to defend by saying statements like
NO
HOW CAN YOU SAY LIKE THAT
NO...AND....
YES YOU ARE RIGHT, ITS YOUR FEELING BUT....

see all above reactions make you look like an advocate or a hardcore seller.

here we apply a technique from NLP

suppose a customer says your product has worst quality.
first thing you ask is"what makes you say so"
he would certainly give an example for instance"i used it the color fades away in second wash"
"ok" your reply

i admit that fact sir but........oh my god this is where the problem begins. but and admit cant be together either you admit or you say but.

as soon as you say but you loose the person and begin the argument again. see how

i admit that fact sir but now we have improved the quality..


the better way can be:

i admit the fact sir, a lot of customer complaint the same problem and i was sure that i am soon going to hear couple of them here also.
since a lot of customer complaint about it and keeping this in consideration to company decided to revise the whole quality process and now we have a new color fastening formula added to the fabric.

do you see what happens.
you admitted what the audience said as well as you added what you wanted to say.
remember "yes" and "and" rather then
"no" and "but" approach.


let people feel your presentations. state example from their life. make the experience the product mentally. take for a ride in car or even make them use the power windows than simply tel
ling power as a car feature.

make sure you keep audience packed up. you should be able to control the direction of presentation.

use audio visuals they are very effective tools and use innovative techniques to keeping audience in movement.

give a pleasant ending and avoid being judgmental.
let audience judge our presentation, service or product.
feel good about it the audience will automatically feel good about it.
remember people buy people not products.

match their choices with your products and avoid imposing your features on them as their choices.

nobody loves when you sell them something, but everybody loves buying.
presentation happens at every stage interviews, meetings, lunches and even social gathering. your views are products and you are the presenter people buy you means they build relations to you when you are like them. flexible, non judgmental and open minded.

"aao hum sab pehan le aaina sare dekhenge apna hi chera sabko saare haseen lageneg yahan"

so remembr a presenter doesn't have to speak, he just has to listen and design his words that pleases everyone.

have a great day
prince gera

istant rapport part 2

everyone around you wants attention. the special color of the shirt, that wonderful car color and even by their new house sometimes they want to communicate something or other.
they desperately look out for listeners.since everyone is searching for listener what should we become. the answer seems obvious. be a emphatic listener. lend your ears to others and then see how things turn around.
give them the attention they are seeking. this craving for attention will make them do much. you can make it easy for them by giving them attention.
remember their name, ask them about everything the like, buy, do or simply feel interested in them. then only they will feel interested in you.
praise them for the new they do and encourage them for their efforts. see how things change around...
to be a wonderful speaker you just need to be a wonderful listener.
prince gera

HI rai/sonu

oh just received your friend request on orkut. glad to meet you after such a long time. hows russia and hows London. so is sonu married? if yes then congratulations from my side. even i miss u people a lot. say my hello to suresh, amarjeet and all your gang even akshay also.
prince gera

regain faith in relationship

wow just finished with a plr session with a young girl. who would always think that men cheat and everybody is selfish. this feeling was ruining her current life as she was getting hyper possessive for her man.
that possessiveness and control was sending the man actually away. her emotions were controlled by fear. she has a fear of loosing him. after a PLR we came across some unexplored areas of her subconscious mind. after finding from where she developed these feelings we could easily remove these feelings from her mind.
now she feels relaxed and has started feeling Faith for her love.
now she wont suspect on him unnecessarily. good one...i enjoyed..

phobia removed

hi just had a wonderful session with a young girl who had a phobia of onions.
she could not see it or even bear a sight of it.
half an hour session and she moved out and held one in hand and even chopped it.
she in fact promised me to go home and make an onion salad for family.
she even had a phobia of escalators that we managed to remove too hope she enjoys going to malls now.
prince

impress instanlty almost anyone!! part 1

To create instant rapport
A lot of people work really hard to make instant rapport with people they come across.
This article will help all of those who wish to be liked by everyone. These techniques can really help you build quick and long lasting relations even in just one meeting.
1. Love yourself: how can you expect others to love you or even like you when you hate yourself the most. You are unique and wonderful. Accept this fact. If you feel bad about you then try this exercise before you move further.
Look at yourself in the mirror and then close your eyes. Now think of the person who really loves you and cares for you unconditionally.
Just imagine you are that person and open yourself and look at your image in the mirror. Now you will be able to see yourself from that persons point of you. See what that persons loves you for. See yourself from his/her eyes.
How do you feel now, I am sure you feel good and different.
Now hold this feeling of goodness in you. Take few breaths and tell yourself that you are wonderful and unique. You are your favorite. (don’t worry you will not become self obsessed . We will talk about it soon)
Okay what kind of person would you like to be with. I am sure a good, happy and fun loving person. So now think, what kind of person would people like to be with. I hope you got the answer. Now we begin to become that.




Communication begins at mind first.
We communicate our thoughts and feelings. These thoughts and feeling are originated out of our mind. So every communication actually originates at mind.

Communication is a 24x7 process.
We communicate even when we do not communicate anything deliberately. Lets take an example: you go home today and don’t utter anything for next 10 hours. You will see people coming and questioning you about your mood, your health and even a lot of issues.
Did you communicate anything, yes you did.
You didn’t do it deliberately but since communication is 24x7 process so it takes place on its own.

We must understand our mind first.
How human mind works?
Let us look at how our conscious and subconscious mind work together to allow us to grow, develop and create our life.
Our conscious mind is our "awareness" it is our communication centre. It thinks, reasons, calculates, plans, directs all actions of the body, determines results and makes decisions. It is creative, it registers pain, fear, happiness and it sets goals (both long-term and very short-term goals). In order for the conscious mind to be able to do all of these things, it must have a place to pull information from - a storage area.
The subconscious mind is our data storage bank. When our conscious mind asks, our subconscious mind gives.
The subconscious mind takes in everything we learn and experience in our lifetime. It begins at birth (some say before birth), soaking up information like a sponge, accumulating data as we grow and experience life. It also begins forming beliefs based on what we learn and what we experience, which determines how we react to everything in our life.
These beliefs gain both strength and momentum the older we become. The subconscious mind does not make choices; it accepts everything, good and bad, positive and negative.
The conscious mind, however, does make choices, almost every minute of our lives. Since everything has its equal and opposite such as day has night, love has hate, prosperity has poverty and on and on, our lives are a matter of choice, our conscious choice.
All these conscious choices are made with the information we have amassed in our subconscious mind over our lifetime. The simple conclusion is that if we are dissatisfied with anything in our lives, we must do something that will work at adding, altering, or changing those beliefs in our subconscious mind....for the quality of your life is directly related to the quality.
Just imagine an empty glass. Now when I fill this glass with orange color liquid what flavor comes in your mind, I am sure orange and when I fill it with yellow. It gives you a flavor of mango or lemon.
You can feel the taste on your tongue without even physically tasting it. Where is the taste coming from? Yes it already recorded in your mind.
The subconscious stores memories, habits, incidents and even learning. So now what is learned can be unlearned too. Wow, so you can have an access to all your memories and alter them as per their convenience.
Remember you started learning anything. May be computers or driving car.
How was it? Tough isn’t it. You broke it down into steps. Like, go in the car, place the key and so on.
After a few days repeat you now drive it wonderfully. When you were learning it your conscious mind was in action and it was continuously recording the incidences in subconscious.
Now you can be busy on your cell phone and even hold a drink in hand. It doesn’t matter because your subconscious takes the seat and helps you to run it involuntarily.
Subconscious is a powerhouse. It is a library of emotions, processes and even looks after other involuntary activities like your breathing, digestion, blood flow and several other operations.

We will work on subconscious to design our behavior that happens consciously or subconsciously.
Belief
Ok let’s talk of a limiting belief.
Just like, I can’t sing in front of classmates.
Now say I can sing very badly in front of classmates.
Now actually it says that you can sing at least and we can work to improve singing skills.
And the other factor is classmate. We can work on that too. Only when we get to know what makes you feel awkward to sing in front of classmates.
So once we know what kind of emotion is triggered in mind when we think of classmates or singing. We change surely do alterations to change this behavior of limiting belief to confidence.

addicted! no more

i am sure there are many situations in your life where you feel yourself addicted to something you really dont want to be with.
just a simple step.
give me reasons you want to quit that thing because of.
it can be leaving a person because of the amount of humiliation he or she has caused you and you still feel compulsory obsessed with them person.
step 1
take a few deep breaths and say relax to your mind when you exhale.
step 2
just think of an incident that made you feel disgusted and you decided to quit this addiction or person.
feel as you are feeling it now, see as you are seeing it now and sense it as you are sensing it now.
step 3 think of another incident and than another and than 4th one.
step 4
now run these incidents in your mind just one after the another. run them overlapping each other. run them in detail with sound and bright color.
feeling really disgusted about it. too bad and too pathetic.
once you are through just let me how bad you feel about it now. or just strong you feel about quiting it now.


step 5
now we need to ask what we want instead.
now just make a list of things you would feel great after getting free from this addiction.
what would you do and how would you feel.
is it wonderful if yes than.
now run a movie of future as if you are there in that picture. feeling good about being free from that compulsion.
feeling relaxed and very rejuvenated.
just lock this feeling then and there itself.
feel good about it now.
prince gera

nervous before interview or presentation!

hi to all!
this is one of the most common issue students come up with.
this can also be called as performance anxiety and it happens mostly a few minutes before the actual event.
mostly we are not concerned with the event but we are more anxious about the result
anxious about the result! without the action has taken place.

lets take an example:
you have to give a presentation in college. next is your turn.
so now your major concern is with your performance so you dont bother to consider that current performances.

see how you feel? do you feel nervous and anxious?
is your heart beating too fast? is the throat dried up?
if these are the regular feelings for you then this exercise will help you.

step:1 close you eyes and take a few deep breaths.
every time you exhale say relax to your own mind.
you may breath for a few seconds and bring your mind to a calm state.

step2: now imagine yourself floating out of your body and move upwards. observe your self from a reasonably good height.
step3: now since you can see yourself siting on that chair. move that image a bit in the future to a point when this incident gets over.
step4: see yourself smiling and feeling very good that you have successfully accomplished what you wanted to.

example:
pankaj has to appear in an interview. he is anxious and is constantly thinking about it.
he nows closes his eyes and floats upwards and looks at his own image(as if you are watching a movie).
then he imagines himself coming out of the interview with a smile. he even sees him giving hugs to his friends and receiving good feedback from others.

a few seconds and he is out of anxiety.
he was worried and was imagining bad about his interview with this exercise he shifted his focus from bad result to a good result.

NOTE: i am sure what people argue about this exercise. they would say what if my result is not as per my expected image.
see this exercise makes you positive and relaxed so the chances of getting good and positive results are more.
if feeling anxious, nervous makes you feel good then you can skip this exercise.
:-)
regards
prince gera
10:45am 16 june

anxiety: the what will happen syndrome!

Anxiety

It seems that the buzz word of the generation now. I have been teaching in management colleges from last 5 years. Every year I come across so many new students. They all come from different parts of the country with different educational and cultural background. They all have one thing common that is their abstracted goal.

They carry one thing is bulk. Anxiety, the will happen then…syndrome. Believe me majority have them join post graduate courses because of this reason only.

Either they have a fear of loosing what they have, a fear of getting ridiculed or a fear of being out casted amongst their own people or a desire of being someone unique, extraordinarily different.

These are abstractive goals. First thing that I get to hear from them is their introduction. This is where I get to hear the maximum used phrased “I want to be successful”. What a vast spectrum! How would one define it in specific terms. How will you realize that you are successful.

Will there be a certification awarded that authenticates success or some kind of emotions are felt on being successful.

Churning out a little they come up with same answer.

I will be happy when I get success. That means the day I get my favorite car or getting that favorite job or even getting married to the loved one.

Read again “I will be happy” so happiness is the outcome of success. It is a final essence for which they have been running around for. They travel so far, they work so hard and even struggle for so long to feel this emotion. Even the fancy car doesn’t comes with it. It lies with in them. Within all of us. The problem is we with some much of education analyze the past and plan the future and in this zest the present gets lost some where.

My first wish to every student or learner or any body is you become successful they day you start being happy.

The intensity of pain and happiness cannot be measured. A man riding a new car cannot say his happiness is more than the poor man who some how managed to buy a new cycle.

Or the mother who has her baby cannot say her pain is more than the lady who lost her husband.

If you are happy you are the most successful person in this life. If you have million dollars and you are still upset then there is something really wrong with you.

I conducted a survey where I asked 70 young graduates if they would like to spend a weekend with family or with their friends. The 90% opted for friends or some one else but certainly not family.

Imagine how would you feel if tomorrow your child grows up and tells you that he doesn’t like your company. Why is it so?

There is a lack of love in families now. Kids look around for friends, social networking sites, movies, affairs, hostel and several other means.

Principle is very simple what you give is what you get. The universe works on laws of attraction we get what we release in this universe. For example a family where parents give time and love ultimately get time and love whereas in a family where dad gives humiliation and money. He gets the same when child grows up.

Make sure you invest wisely in your relations…

Prince gera

(pardon spellings)